Last night I had a dream. I was looking in the mirror when I saw that the person in the mirror was changing a little: she had a fringe and a scowl. I moved closer and to the left and she stayed there, looking at me! I tried to tell Herve “My reflection is different to me! Look. Look! My reflection is different to me but he couldn’t hear…he was looking but he was like an imbecile, a clown just smiling and moving his head…his reflection was also different. I threw a chair at his feet to startle him out of the ‘happy trance’ but he didn;t react. I ran from the room screaming and a chair hit my back. The real Herve woke me gently when he heard me making noises in my sleep. I told him my dream.
My reflection is different to me.
Now I am here, awake and I realise it is what I have been thinking for months. What people see is different from the real me.
I called this girl in the mirror back and asked he what message she had. She was just really pissed off with everything and everyone. She was angry and hurt and resentful and envious. I tried to make her laugh but she then told me off for putting her in situations that she doesn’t want to be in. People hurt her and take advantage of her. She would prefer to be alone without anyone. People scare her and annoy her. She didn;t like it when I laughed and tried to cajole her.
She had a permanent scowl 😦
Poor inner shadow side me 😦
Ok. So we have met. Not sure what is next. I thanked her for showing herself and coming in to the light.
This journal is really becoming my psych! lol