Lately, I have noticed that I am talking to myself more. Not in a weird way…well, maybe haha. I mean that I am noticing my patterns and behaviours even more and am ale to communicate with my ego side to help shift.
I have come to realise that every emotion I feel in response to what happens in my life is a perfect opportunity to NOT judge this and have a conversation with my ego-self about how to move forward together. I am kind and patient and loving towards the response and emotion and I try to understand (by just listening) what is causing the reaction. Then we discuss how we can move forward.
For example. When we did not get a job on the first round of the job search and our plans are delayed, I felt embarrassed and even deeply ashamed. for some reason I cared so much that everyone else would think me a failure. Now my Higher self knows this to be not my truth, but my ego has had too many experiences of shame and being laughed at to think more nobly. It wants to protect me and is horrified that the same thing will happen…I will be laughed at and ashamed and it goes in to action mode to help me avoid that scenario…blame is the usual route of choice but also self doubt, hiding away and avoiding and thinking negative things on the people I know would actually judge me.
I explained that those feelings are in teh past and I can handle things better now. I don’t need to be so protected. It makes for a very interesting discussion which I won’t go into here.
The biggest lesson here is to listen to my inner thoughts and feelings, give them a voice and an opportunity to see things from a different perspective and release old fearful patterns.